Fighting Sleep and the Bug, Yet the Proceso Oficial Begins

I don't need no stinkin' sleep! And she don't need no stinkin' bug!

The G man and I went to the pool today after work, and he swam and swam and swam. I thought surely that'd wipe him out and he'd fall asleep right away at bedtime. Nope. He could not get settled and so called me into his room to lay down with him for a bit. I did, and we had some good snuggle time. Then, after a few minutes I got up to go, and he started to cry. "Mommy, later on in the night can I come sleep in your bed?" I told him if he wakes up in the middle of the night and wants to, he can come sleep with me. Then I said good night. Within a minute, he was crying and calling out to me. I went in to check, and amidst his very sincere tears, he told me, "Mommy, I don't think I can do that. I can't wake up in the middle of the night. I'm afraid I won't. Can't you just come get me and carefully lift me up into your bed?" How can one say no to that? Well, I never answered yes or no. Now, he is sound asleep and I know both he and I will sleep better in our own beds. But I also know that if he is still in his bed come morning, he's gonna be some-mad at me. What to do...

We got an e-mail June 15 from our adoption agency, and the good news is that the documents have been translated and the power of attorney has been registered, which really officially starts the paperwork in Guatemala to bring home Izzie. This week the attorney will file with Family Court. We got another e-mail today, and our adoption agency let us know that poor Izzie has been sick. She went to the doctor, and luckily doesn't have strep! It is a viral infection. She apparently is on the mend. Poor thing. Griffin and I said a little prayer asking God to take care of Izzie. It is soooo hard on infants when they have stuffed-up noses and ears. I remember when Griffin was about six months old and got his first really bad cold. He was so miserable, and the only way he could get any sleep was to prop him up slightly. I put some hard pillows under his crib mattress, to give it a bit of a recline. That seemed to help, but not much. I also used a humidifier, took him into the closed bathroom, cranked the shower on HOT and held him while the warm mist filled the air. Oh, and there was the dreaded snot sucker. He would scream when I tried to unclog his nostrils. I surely didn't blame him. I'd never want anyone to stick some rubber bulbous thing up my nose to try and suction out crusty, thick, icky snot.

Well... here's to fighting sleep and fighting bugs. May Griffin get a good night's rest and may Mary Isabela get well.

Peace,
B

Precious Heart

She couldn't be cuter. And so tiny. We finally received new photos and a new video of little Izzie and she is pure love. Of course, while seeing her sweetness makes me so happy, my heart also hurts. I want to scoop her up and can't. I am starting to get this thing called an emotional roller coaster when it comes to international adoption. When I received her referral, and first pictures and video, I was smitten. For days I couldn't stop thinking about her. Then, slowly... for sanity's sake and for the facts of life... I had to disconnect a bit. Her presence, while never forgotten, was less intense.
Then BAM! We get new pictures and a new video and I'm back on an Izzie High. I'm thinking we may just have to make a visit trip. I'm dreaming about her, talking to Griffin about his little sister, sharing her picture with anyone who will look.
Well, only about seven more months of this ride (if we're lucky! say your prayers that our journey to bring Mary Isabela home will be trouble-free).
Good night Izzie. We love you.

She's a Night Owl for Now

At just a few days old, Izzie apparently had her nights and days mixed up. It's a common conundrum for babes, after all, it's night all the time for nine months, and they sleep and eat, kick and flip, and wave their arms and suck their thumbs and who knows what else in the calm and quiet of darkness. So Izzie sleeps all day, then wakes up when the sun goes down. She's up until 2, sleeps till 4, then is ready for a bottle! That may have changed as she is now 3 weeks old! What a gal...

Her big brother, the G man, never had his days and nights confused, really. He had a real predictable schedule. Between about 11 p.m. and 8 a.m., he'd sleep for two hours, nurse and fuss and nurse and scream and nurse and cry for an hour, sleep for two hours, nurse and fuss and nurse and cry for an hour, sleep for two hours, and on and on. During the day, he took naps, but sure enough, he nursed every two hours until he was 11 months old. I was a very tired momma.

Now, Griffin is a night owl, and sleeps in like a teenager. That boy has been known to sleep to 11 a.m.! It is good for me, who has never been a morning person.

We'll see how little Miss Mary Isabela develops her sleep patterns!

On another note, I sent a package to my agency, and they'll take it down to her next week. A few items for her, and a few thank-you items for the foster family. Everything has to fit in a gallon bag, so you see, it can't be much.

Adios for now. I've got to go clean the house.

The Name

Mary Isabela

And her big brother has decided she will be called Izzie.

God bless Mary Isabela.

Baby Sister Needs A Name!

Help! I feel like I'm trapped in a Berenstain Bears episode, because I refer to our sweet baby girl as baby sister. I'm trying so hard to think of the right name for her, and I'm doing it in the confines of just a few choices. I want to include my mom's name and I'd like to use something from our little girl's given name, and/or part of her birth mom's name.

So that leaves me with but a few options:

Mary Isabela
Isabela Mary
Haydee Marianne

Which way to go? The little G guy wants to call her Izzie, so his vote is for Isabela Mary or Mary Isabela. Perhaps if we went with Mary Isabela, we could instead use the nickname of Maisey, which I also like. At least two very dear friends have voted for Haydee Marianne, because Haydee is unusual, but cute.

Stay tuned...

Our Beautiful Baby Girl

I cannot believe it. We have received our referral. And she is so sweet, and amazing. I can't stop looking at her beautiful face. We're still deciding on her name, so stay tuned.
Now begins the second wait, probably the toughest and longest, to bring her home. Please pray with us that it will be speedy and without problems. And please pray that our baby girl will be safe and well-cared for while she waits to come home. And finally, pray for her birth mother that she is comforted in knowing that her baby girl is already loved by so many, and that she will be a cherished daughter and sister in our family.

My Handsome Guy

The G man has had to get glasses, and boy is he too handsome in them. He is doing great wearing them, although he did manage to step on them just about a week after getting them. Luckily, they didn't break. Kids' glasses ain't cheap! Anyway, let's hope that wearing the glasses will correct (or improve) the vision in his right eye. Otherwise he may have to start wearing a patch too. While he would look like his cool friend Q in his patch and glasses, I'm hoping we don't have to patch. Q wears his patch very well, but it is still a struggle (according to his mom). Okay, here's a pic of Griff with his new glasses, standing next to R2D2 and CP30 (or is it C3PO) at our post office. Griffin made me bring the camera so we could get a pic of his favorite little robot R2D2, who lives (according to Griffin) in robot land, which is a big, big desert. Does anyone remember the beginning of the first Star Wars (in order of how the movies came out) when Luke bought R2D2 and CP30, and then R2D2 ran away. That is as far as we got when watching the movie about six months ago, because Griffin got very upset and worried about R2D2 getting lost. But those 15 minutes of the movie left a big impression... and Griffin still recalls what robot land looks like.

It's true, I really was born!

Finally, my birth certificate arrived, notarized, certified and authenticated. Today I put it in the hands of the US Post Office, and am keeping my fingers crossed that it'll arrive safe and sound in the Chicago Guatemalan Consulate tomorrow by noon. The USPS has tried my nerves... I talked with the Illinois authentication office last Friday, and was told that my certificate left their office on April 18. Well, instead of putting in my mail box, the USPS decided to forward it to my parents' house. In fact, much of my mail is now being forwarded to my parents' house. The USPS has even sent notices to various businesses that mail me regularly to inform them of my *new* address, so now my parents are receiving bank statements, bills, etc. -- all meant for me! AAARRRGGHHH! My parents lived here briefly while their house was being built, and then filled out forwarding address forms (each individually) so that they'd get their mail that was coming here forwarded to their new house. So now, more than four months later, the USPS has decided they should also forward all my mail to my parents. I'm highly annoyed.

Well, at least my parents live only a half-hour away, and they kindy brought my birth certificate here last night so I could get it out asap. My agency did tell me that they received my Virginia divorce papers from the D.C. Guatemalan consulate so hooray! I'm so nearly done with the dotting of i's and crossing of t's, and wrapping up the dossier.

And hopefully soon I'll get a referral. That will be amazing. It really is all amazing.

As for other news, Disney World was too much fun. I'm so glad I was able to take the G man to Disney, and that my parents were able to share it with us. G really had a blast, as did we all. At breakfast on the first day we went to Magic Kingdom, G colored a picture of Mickey M. and announced that he wanted to give it to Mickey when he saw him. It was too cute. G walked up to Mickey, handed him the pic, and gave him a big hug.

Will The Loose Ends End?

I'm still awaiting the blasted birth certificate, but I was able to get a hold of the Illinois folk as they were processing my request, so now I'll not only get the certificate, it'll be authenticated too! Then it goes to the Guatamalan consulate in Chicago. The divorce certificate is in, and authenticated. But did I tell you it doesn't mention anything about me taking back my maiden name... a document that must be part of my dossier? Well, now I have to get the divorce decree from the court authenticated too. Luckily, the Virginia authentication office called today and I should have it tomorrow. Despite the confusion I had with them, they really stepped up. The woman I spoke with this evening was personally dropping it of at the Fedex drop off box. Thank you Virginia!
The most exciting news is that my agency thinks I might see a referral in the next month or so. No guarantees, but still... wow! I know that's when the big wait sets in, but it really is exciting.
Speaking of exciting, in just two days the G man and I will be on a plane to DisneyWorld. Grams and Papa are meeting us there, and we are going to have fun fun fun! Especially Griffin. He so deserves this; he really is my wonderful sweet boy. He had kindergarten assessment today. It is so hard to believe my little guy will be starting kindergarten in the fall. I'm very proud of him!
Well, I must get to work on some freelance projects I have.
Ciao for now.

The Blasted Birth Certificate

So obviously the divorce decree has put a kink in my process. But how tough is it to get a birth certificate? I sent for it the first week of March, and here it is the third week of April and nada! I do hope it comes in the mail this week... or at least by early next week! Regardless, we're going to DISNEYWORLD! Yep, gotta go for a conference and thought it'd be a great opportunity to take the little monkeydoodle down there. I can't say he's overly excited about it, but I'm sure it's because he really has no concept of what Disneyworld is to kids. I'm so excited to see how much fun he is going to have. My dear parents are coming with us, and they'll watch my guy while I work at the conference during the week. It is going to be fun.

Ciao for now. I've got some serious deadlines this week!

I'm approved to be approved!

Yep, I cleared the first hurdle (albeit the easiest) in our journey to bring home little sister. I got CIS approval, which came about a month before I expected. Of course I was over the moon. Now if I could get all those niggling little pieces of paper to finish their journeys for notaries, stamps, authentications, reviews, etc., etc.

I've hit one snag along the way... not realizing my divorce decree had to come from Virginia's vital records department, I got a notarized copy from the court where the divorce was granted. Then I sent it off to the Virginia state department to get authenticated, where they told me it wasn't dated so they couldn't authenticate. So I called the court, and they said, oh... you need it certified and authenticated so you can get it authenticated? Okay, we'll do that. Send us a letter... so the court in speedy order sent me a new dated, certified divorce decree. Then I was reading the form letter that the Virginia state department had sent me, and saw a spot (not checked, mind you) that said vital records that need to be authenticated must come from the vital records department. Sorry, didn't know that a divorce decree was a vital record. Apparently in the commonwealth, it is! So now I'm back to square one on the divorce document. I've sent a letter and money to the vital records department requesting a certified copy of my divorce, and asking them to send it on to the Virgina state department to authenticate. This has set me back about two weeks in getting the dossier done. I always hated that divorce.

And, I'm still waiting for my birth certificate from the middle state of Illinois. Hurry up!

Griffin is so sweet, by the way. He built me a house in the living room (using his favorite building materials, every pillow and cushion within the living room confines, plus a few step stools). This house has an upstairs and a downstairs, and a super-soft floor. He is amazing. He told me he built it just for me, using all his skills.

Adios for now. I must work.

NC off to GC, two more to go

On Friday I sent off a stack of notarized and authenticated docs (all done in NC) to the Guatemalan consulate in Georgia, where they'll legalize them. I hit my first little snag with my docs (done in VA). My divorce decree from the courthouse needed to be authenticated, not certified, in order to get authenticated again by the VA state department. Go figure. So back to square one with that. Luckily the courthouse is very quick, and then I'll send the two docs to VA state department for authentication, then send those off to get authenticated again by the GC in DC. Still waiting for my birth certificate from IL, then that has to go to the GC in Chicago. Are you with me? Well, once all that is done I'll have my paperwork finished. And hopefully that'll all come together by Mayish, the same time I hope to get my CIS approval. Then sometime after that, hopefully a referral!
Now that I'm this far along in the process, I cannot stop thinking about her. I'm finding it hard to work. But work I must.
Griffin is on Spring break this week and spending lots of time with his grams and papa. He is very happy to be at their house having lots of sleepovers. Of course, it is very quiet here... and it is only 1 p.m. and they all just left a few hours ago. It is going to be a quiet lonely week. Luckily I have more than enough work and projects to keep me busy.
I'll also be anxiously checking the mail every day. Dernit, I wish my birth certificate would arrive!
Adios for now.

Decision Made... For Now

I've done it. I've shushed my mind and am pursuing full-force to adopt a little girl from Guatemala. Griffin can't wait to meet his sister, and I can't wait to meet my daughter. I've been actually in the process of this adoption since late Fall, and in the past two weeks, as I was plugging away on my dossier, things seem to blow up with regards to Guatemalan adoptions. But despite all the rumors and stories and fears and on and on, my agency (whom I trust) along with other agencies, are continuing their programs. In recent days I was teetering on switching to Vietnam, but for now, I'm sticking with Guatemala. And I'm at peace with this decision. For now.

Life, a job, and other heavy stuff.

I applied for a different job this week. I'm sure what I've asked for in salary is too high, but mama's gotta raise the hog, slaughter it, and cook it too. And at my age, it is really hard to go too far backwards in the pay scale. Not that I could anyway. There's the house, and the car, and the food, and the health insurance, and the heat, and the AC, and the cable, and the phone, and the cell phone in case of emergency, and the electricity, and well someone has to pick up the trash, and the newspaper, and clothes, and geez... how the h-e-double-toothpicks do people do it?

Well anyway, I applied for the job. And it could be cool. But I doubt I could work from home. Which I do now. Which I love because I'm here a lot for my little guy. But I hate because it can be lonely. Especially since there's no pig farmer coming home in the eves to keep me company.

So we'll see. And if not, perhaps I'll audit a creative writing class this summer. Perhaps I need to break out a bit. Life can't be so consumed by my current job, which while putting the bacon on the table, tends to suck the life out of me at times. Not that I'm complaining. Or am I?

Maybe there's a novel in me. Or a good non-fiction thriller. Or a kid's book. Or a how-to? Or another business, to accompany the baby boutique I currently own.

Time for bed.

Obsoletion

Trust me, I'm not oblivious to the war that's breaking out in the Middle East. I've been actively following it for two days. CNN is on in the background as I write. But right now, I've got to butter my bread. Deadlines are weighing down on me, as I have to file a story about a congressional hearing on RFID.

I'll have to post commentary (not that anyone necessarily cares what I have to say) on the Middle East situation later, likely on Sunday. We're heading out of town this eve.

Just one thought though. When the fighting between Israel and the Hezbollah in Lebanon broke out, I felt angered at the idea that Israel would risk so much. Couldn't they take the higher ground? I'm not passing judgement on Isreal, but my knee-jerk reaction was "oh my god, this could escalate to all out war in that region; we have soldiers over there; Middle East instability is so dangerous for the U.S., blah blah). Then I thought how arrogant of me. Our country doesn't like it when others try and tell us what to do with regards to war. How dare we? Yeah, yeah, I'm aware of all the implications and our world role, etc. etc. But still....

Bottom line -- war sucks. for everybody.

This pretty much sums up how I feel about war:

Either war is obsolete or men are.
-R. Buckminster Fuller, July 12, 1895 – July 1, 1983, American visionary, designer, architect, and inventor.

Gotta go.

Slipping Two Steps Behind

Y'know, I just missed being in that hip new group called Gen-X by one year. I'm a baby boomer. Of course, so are my parents... and yet we are a generation apart. Anyway, I couldn't help but feel like I somehow got lumped with all the fuddy-duddies (sorry mom and dad). Now I've come to find out that my generation has been pushed down the ladder another rung. There's a new generation now, with its own hip name: The Net Generation. The N-Gen. N-Geners. And I'm several years out of that group... 13 years, to be exact. Bummer.

See, the N-Gen are those folk that can't remember a time when E-mail didn't exist. Or the Web. Or gaming. They have gadgets galore, and spend gobs of time online in various chat rooms, meeting places, communities and boards. They IM. Download music to iPods and MP3 players. They blog (hey, so do I!), and Vlog. They have screen names, become avatars. This N-Gen is a wired(less) engine. But cut me some slack. I may have had an electric typewriter and be able to remember a time when faxing was very avant garde. (At my first job, the fax machine was the high-tech way we exchanged information with business partners.) Yeah, and sometimes I called my bosses and verbally gave them stories I was filing from the road. But I'll tell you what, I can't imagine not being able to surf the Web, shop online or E-mail. So even though I'm two generations behind, I still feel closer to N-Geners than Baby Boomers.

Or maybe I'm just wanting to squeeze too tight on that slippery soap called youth.

FRID

I'm a writer by profession. That'd explain why this is my first blog, and I've never really kept a diary, except for that tormented time in college when I spent so many nights cryin' over a boy named Allan. I still have that journal. It is as silly as it sounds.

So, I write all day. And it's nothing super-cool (well to me, anyway). I'd love to write about architecture, or skiing, or sailing, or wars and politics and third-world countries and solving world peace. But I'll settle for pretty cool.

Right now, I'm covering RFID (I often type it too fast and it ends up as FRID, hence this blog's name). Anyway, RFID is a technology. Couldn't you tell? All technology is written in acronyms. RFID stands for radio frequency identification. For privacy freaks, RFID means tiny little spychips that spooky governments are going to inject into the nooks of all of our backs while we sleep so they can collect nanosecond by nanosecond our every move. For corporate behemoths plotting to take over the world, like Wal-Mart, RFID represents innovative new technology that'll solve the problem of an empty shelf when the Wal-Mart shopper walks down the aisle looking for fried pork skins. For the middle of the road folks looking both ways, RFID will settle in as a useful tool to help track goods, improve food and drug safety, and even provide personal security, if you want it. There's quite a few other useful applications for RFID, which by the way are tiny chips the size of a grain of rice that communicate data via RF waves.

So I write about RFID. (Now you know why I have the RFID Journal link... a very good site owned and run by my friend and employer Mark Roberti, who offered me a part-time gig to write articles every week for the online publication.) I also cover other technologies, and have for the better part of 15 years. Let's see... I was writing about networking, IBM mainframes, and a strange thing called OSI (Open Systems Interconnect... I even wrote a 120-page book on this tech topic!) before e-mail was a common form of communication. Fax was where it was at back then. I wrote about network and system management before IP was hip. Then came the Internet, the World Wide Web, and E-commerce (yep, covered 'em all). I moved on to enterprise applications, service-oriented architectures, and more.

I'm freelancing now full time, spending half of my work week covering RFID and the other half covering various and sundry technologies for various clients. I'd like to go on to other stuff, but I must be mindful of what butters my bread. I got a little one and a decent lifestyle that at 41, I'm not willing to give up.

Of course, writing full time, whatever the topic, leaves me with little incentive to ramble in a blog or write some amazing short story or >gasp!< a novel. Maybe someday.

Anyhoo, I've got to get back to the butter. And RFID.

Explosions Everywhere

Since moving to Wilmington, N.C. about two months ago, I've not had the chance to watch CNN or other news junkets like I used to. Not that I don't want to. But my parents are staying with me and my son while their house is being built, and there always seems to be something going on. Don't get me wrong. I'm really enjoying my parents here. As a single mom it is nice to have adult company. And I really do like my parents. Also, they're a huge help with my son... I have to say I'm getting a tad (okay, a lot) spoiled. Three sets of eyes, ears and hands to go around, and they're all quite busy as Griffin is a talker and a mover -- non-stop.

So back to CNN and the rest of the news. Not only is the constant commotion that's ongoing here preventing me from sitting in the easy chair (after the Grifster goes to bed, mind you) and getting my fill of headlines, talking heads, in-depths, tops-of-the-hour, weather updates, and more... the freelance career I was forced to start up has kept me busy many a night. (Speaking of, I should be working right now on one story... don't worry Patty, it'll be in on time.)

So, instead of editing this eve I clicked the mouse to cnn.com and saw the lead story about the train bombings in India. When I had checked first thing this morning, the lead was a second-day story on the building explosion in NYC. Explosions everywhere.

Granted, these two stories are vastly different: one a suspected suicide attempt and no loss of life; the other a suspected terrorist attack with more than 170 dead and many more injured. But both are fundamentally the same. Blasts that ripped quite unexpectedly through the ordinary process of living, both at the apparent hands of people who somehow lost their ability to imagine -- and live within -- that very first minute after their explosions went off.

After all, had the New York man compelled his mind to consider the passersby whose flesh would be shredded from the shrapnel flying from the building within seconds after he tried to take his life, he might have reconsidered. Or perhaps had he thought about the minutes after when firemen would risk their lives, and in the process get injured, as they fought their way into a burning building to check for survivors, he might have tried a less invasive form of suicide.

What if the Indian perpetrators had harnessed what little humaness their souls had left, perhaps they'd have accounted for the mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, sisters or brothers who within a millisecond of the bomb's tick would cease to exist, leaving behind a trail of mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, sisters and brothers forever weeping over their losses. Would they have, could they have, opted for a more peaceful protest?

The New York man didn't die. And now he has the rest of his life (however long that may be) to consider what he did, and what he might have done. Presumably the terrorists are dead. I am of the belief that they'll have black and grueling eternity to consider what they did.

I just wish they all could have put themselves in someone else's place before their bombs went off. I wish they could have put themselves in the passersby's, firemen's, mothers', fathers', sons', daughters', sisters' and brothers' shoes for just one minute... that one minute.

As we all should. As often as we can try.